I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
