We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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