Midget sex pt 2 tonight
My hand turned me down
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize