The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
