She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
