Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize