He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
