I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Randomize
