It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
