ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
