Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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