Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize