4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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