Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
