with your own penis?
lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
