Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Only a mothe r could love this liver
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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