in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I need water and some morals
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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