in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
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