Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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