just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
