I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize
