I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Randomize
