Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
