I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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