my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
