We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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