I need help removing her.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
sick fucks of a feather flock together
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
