My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
