my mouth tastes like poor choices
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize