Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
