people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
