So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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