I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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