Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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