i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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