Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Randomize
