Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
