I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
