We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
