I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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