I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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