bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
NoShamevember. You game?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
