Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
