I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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