I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
soo... how was my night?
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