How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
