So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize
