So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
It's official drugs can't kill me
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Vodka?
Forever.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
