Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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