I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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