I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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