Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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